I Graduated College, Now What?
It’s October 3rd, and tomorrow I’ll officially start my first real full-time job. It’s weird. This life after college. I moved to Los Angeles, not to become a starving artist, but to find a way to make it into the audience of the Ellen Degeneres Show, which I have twice, and I am so very proud of myself. I grocery shop at Trader Joe’s, something I thought I would never do, because I’ve always despised the length of their check-out lines and how cold their stores can be. I struggle finding work-clothes that not only fits my style but my closets aesthetic. I sent out over 50, maybe even 100 resumes, hoping that someone would believe in me, like I believe in myself. I’ve listened to strangers give me unsolicited advice about how my degree may never get me anywhere. I got approved for my first credit card that is my own, and not paid for by my parents. And although it was so exciting to see that “YOU’RE APPROVED,” email, I quickly felt a deep sense of fear — a fear of, what is a girl who once had a shopping addiction going to do with a credit card of her own? I sometimes make pasta every night. Not because I love it so much, but because I’m too lazy to follow the many recipes that I’ve printed out. I have an iPhone app that reminds me to take my migraine medicine. I sometimes forget to call my parents, who then quickly assume that I’ve disappeared when in actuality I’ve gone to bed at 7PM. But most of the time, I’m just confused as to how I’ve gotten here. A retired fashion blogger, (maybe soon to come out of retirement) a full-time worker, and a Los Angeles resident avoiding dating apps.